The Call...

Well we got THE call yesterday.  I have actually been called so many times over the past two weeks that when Buckner comes up on my caller ID I don't jump anymore.  Twelve children have been offered for our consideration and 12 children have either gone to another foster home or we decided that their situation was not a good for our family.

So in this instance THE call would be THE call back.  We were called back to inform us that on next Tuesday we willing be getting a 3 (almost 4 ) yr old little boy.  Yes, another boy.  I think this is what God is screaming at me.  "Laura.... you NEED boys in your home.  So, I have relented and excepted this.  I actually love boys and find them incredibly entertaining.

The fun thing about getting a boy placement is that you are all excited about going shopping for clothes, you are really excited about finding out what activity they like.  Will they like cars, blocks, balls?  It so much fun to see how they explore the world around them.  And now little Evan will have a room mate.  Sure hope this little one sleeps ;)

This little boy, from the little I have been told, has a very similar background as Evan.  Except he has been in it much longer.  Mom is addicted to Meth, Dad in and out of the picture.  No family that is stable enough to take care of him.  He is also coming from another foster home who unexpectedly is having to move due to a job transfer so he has been out of his toxic home for a while but what has this precious little boy seen and experienced in his little life?  More than I have for sure!

We are praying for little "L".  Can't wait to meet him!!

The Wait

"Wait for the Lord, Be Strong, and let your heart take courage; Yes wait for the Lord."

Psalm 27:14

It has been really hard waiting this past this year.  We have waited more in the past  two years than we have ever had to in our lives.  When had to wait 9 months to become licenced to foster.  We had to wait for our first call for a placement.  We had to wait for our actual first placement.  We had to wait to hear about how our foster sons case was going to play out.  Wait for his mom and dad to go in and out of jail before the court and the system moved toward termination.  Wait to hear if dad's appeal is going to be denied.  Wait for another placement... and on and on and on.

And here we are a year later and guess what?  We are still waiting.  Some of it we are waiting on his still Evan's case to be resolved but some of it's of our own doing :)

We have really thrown Buckner for a loop with our family.  We approached them about 6 months ago because Steve and I really want to foster and try to straight adopt at the same time.  This means we would love to continue to  be called for foster placements but at the same time we  would like to submit our home study for consideration for children that are ready to be adopted now.  Buckner scratched their heads on this one.  They have not , at least at our local agency, had a family that wanted to do this before.  I didn't understand why this was a big deal but apparently it is because the foster side and adoption side are two separate entities.  They were worried about how it would play out if the foster side called us for kids and we were waiting to hear if we were chosen for a straight adopt placement too.

We solved their problem for them.   We just redid our home study so that we are licenced for 5 children now ;)  We knew we would never foster more than 2 at a time and that we would never submit for a sibling group to adopt more than 2 children.  So we are good!!

So, here we sit waiting again.  We have been called about 12 different children in the past 2 weeks.  They have either gone to another family or we have said no because of extenuating circumstances.  So we wait for a call for another foster placement.  We have also submitted for 7 children to straight adopt.  3 of them we have heard that we were not chosen but we are still "waiting" to hear about the others!!!

God is teaching us pure patience for sure!  It's a joy :)

Stirring

"Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to visit the widows and the orphans in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world."

James 1:27

I can see something amazing happening all around me.  I am not sure if it has always been there or if my eyes are just now being opened to it.

So many families around me are opening their hearts, home and wallets to orphaned children.   I am in awe of the daily phone calls, emails or texts that tell me that someone else is considering fostering or adoption or both.  In a world that seems to only promote self indulgence, this seems like such a huge departure.  To have the stirring to bring an unwanted, abused, neglected, drug addicted orphan in your home is anything other than self serving.  It's hard work like I have never done before. It seems that it has to only be the stirring of the Holy Spirit.  

Maybe I am hyper spiritual about this but I see such a huge chasm between our world and Christianity today.  It's all around us.  Especially when it comes to children and babies.  You see abortion as not a big deal anymore.  Our own government is even debating whether or not late term abortion is ok.  Really?  Late term?  When so many struggle with infertility.  When so many babies are being born premature?  We really get to decide whether a child is a life by our whim?  If we want the child at 32 weeks, its a life.  If we don't, it's not!  Messed up!  When did this even become a debatable issue? 

In our world you can see the total annihilation of the family.  Marriage is at an all time low, fatherless children, even mother's leaving their children for a life of selfishness.  What has happened to our God fearing country and our responsibility to the next generation?  What has happened to pure joy in the faces of our children that fear the Lord?  Where are the Christian men and woman standing up for the families even if it's hard and not really want they want to do?  When did it become a choice for mothers to stay with the father's of their children and give up selfish ambition for them?

Now I am on a soap box but all that to say, that although our world is screaming at us to have smaller families, bigger houses, better cars, more stuff, I see a different world.  Families growing larger, orphans being loved and  sacrifices being made so just one more child knows what it's like to be loved by a family! 

AWE INSPIRING!  

May we be the generation that turns our hearts and minds back to the LORD!!

Baby Boys Abound!!

We just got called for a new foster placement.  This one is a 4 month old baby boy.  I don't think I will ever get girls :)

When you are in the foster care world, things can change in the blink of an eye.  One morning, no baby... that afternoon you have two!!  It's a crazy world we live in!

Again... so worth it though!!!

Why Foster?

Foster care is such unique and crazy journey.  We are still relatively new to the whole process.  We have only had our license for 9 months and a child for all but 2 weeks of those 9 months.  I know my experience is limited  and narrow compared to so many other families that have gone before us.

When we entered in to foster care, like so many others I have talked to, we were incredibly naive and idealistic.  We were going into to "help" a child that needed a loving family to care, nurture and love him like he had never been loved before.  And although I think those ideals are noble on their own and definitely ones you need to keep you going, they are also fleeting if there is not a higher calling behind them.

We would like to have believed that foster care was about "the children" and their needs but what we really have realize is that fostering is about obedience to God first and foremost.  And that without His sustaining love and heart, you will never get through all of the emotion.  The heartbreak over the child's situation, the anger for the parents or family members that have abused or neglected them, the sleepless nights, the medication logs, the endless appointments with ECI, CASA, CPS, Buckner, courts, family visits, the responsibility and the lack of control are all too much too handle on just an idealistic notion.  There has to be a more divine momentum or your resolve will crumble.

This has been one of the hardest things we have ever done.  We have been asked to take in this little boy that for the first 11 months of his life was either abused or neglected and sometimes both at the same time.  We have been asked to nurse him back to health mentally and physcially.  We have been asked to do an unreasonable amount of paperwork everyday or run the risk of having our liscence taken away.  We have been asked to care for him like our own but not "love" him too much in case he goes back to his abusers or some obscure family member.  We have been asked to do this with him and have been called to do it with more kids at the same time too.  Now we have chosen to not take anymore foster children right now because of our current foster sons recurring medical issues but our heart is there for more.

Why?  I can honestly tell you that I DON"T KNOW!!  It's crazy if you think too hard on it for sure.  All I can say is that our journey of fostering so far as been so worth every minute!  To see our little boy come so far physically and mentally is a joy everyday for us.  To know that for the time he is with us , either for a year or a lifetime, that he has changed us forever is amazing.  We would never do it any differently.

A great verse to cling to:

Isaiah 40:28-31

 Have you not known? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength. Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.